... It was an orphanage. Pretty idyllic—a loving caretaker, warm and caring siblings, always something to entertain yourself with, no fear of starvation or anything like that, etc.
Except for that one detail, unbeknownst to all of the kids, of how getting "adopted" actually meant being sent to your death.
... That part's complicated. It's not really relevant, anyway.
[...]
A happy, fulfilling, but short life spent in obliviousness, ending in a relatively quick and easy death.
Or a life of knowing the truth, facing that the reality around you is a lie, and realizing that escape is virtually impossible—and that even if you succeed, you're just headed to a possibly even worse situation.
I don't have it. I have memories dating to from when I was a fetus.
[y e a h]
So I remembered seeing the demons as an infant, which allowed me to realize what was going on once I was old enough to grasp the concepts. [which. was a very young age because prodigy.] Whereas all of my siblings were clueless, I was the only one who knew the truth growing up.
[ray looks mostly passive, since he doesn't really like talking about feelings? but for the sake of his point, he kind of has to.]
... It's true that I probably would've had a much happier life if I'd never known. But those were the cards I was dealt with, so...
[well.]
In the end, knowing—and having that time to prepare—saved my life. More importantly, it saved some of the people I cared about. I was supposed to die on my twelfth birthday. Instead, on that day, I escaped with some of my siblings. We actually managed to pull it off.
[...]
Which isn't to say things are easier now, or even necessarily better. We suffered losses to get this far. We're out in a world that humans were never meant to live in. We have to spend each day in fear. If we die now, it'll likely be a crueler death than what we would've had back at the orphanage.
But it's been worth it, to be free and able to call ourselves human beings—and not cattle children under the demons' control.
So not a no, but not a yes yet either. In that case, let him decide whether it was worth it or not. If he does conclude that he regrets it, then maybe the gods can give him a memory wipe—which is assuming that we are even going to remember anything.
... And besides, there's more than one reason a machine would be disposed of. Regardless of his emotional state, what do you think will happen to him once they design a "better" android model?
So either way, he's on a path that might soon end in death.
[a cheery way of putting it, but.]
And again, it goes back to what you value: a meaningless but ignorantly blissful life, or a difficult life but one where you had the capacity to decide things on your own terms.
I'm not Connor, so I won't decide for him which is better. But neither are you.
[...]
It's not all up to you. Don't get caught up in the trap of thinking it is, like the trap of wondering if you could've done more to save your brother. If Connor wants to find a solution, it's not like he's lacking in friends on the other side to consult with.
And in the end, there's still the matter of the wishes—what we came here for to begin with.
Probably not. Based on what people were discussing, it'll likely be Ambition or Piety. Still, Connor has one more chance to switch, and there's been a lot of talk about granting as many wishes as possible.
I think they're all going to have a proper, final discussion tomorrow. I've asked Newt to see if he can get Patience to make the TV work one more time.
[a pause.]
Speaking of which—it's been confirmed. That rock makes you one of Patience's followers now. The living knows this too, which means that they officially have no choice but to coordinate, as they're all at risk of losing thanks to Patience's potential majority.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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No, not really.
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Except for that one detail, unbeknownst to all of the kids, of how getting "adopted" actually meant being sent to your death.
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Because of the demons, right? But... I thought you knew one of your parents. You grew up in an orphanage?
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[...]
A happy, fulfilling, but short life spent in obliviousness, ending in a relatively quick and easy death.
Or a life of knowing the truth, facing that the reality around you is a lie, and realizing that escape is virtually impossible—and that even if you succeed, you're just headed to a possibly even worse situation.
Which would you pick?
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[...]
I’m guessing you would pick the second if you had a choice.
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I'm the only one who never had a choice, actually. You know what infantile amnesia is?
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[y e a h]
So I remembered seeing the demons as an infant, which allowed me to realize what was going on once I was old enough to grasp the concepts. [which. was a very young age because prodigy.] Whereas all of my siblings were clueless, I was the only one who knew the truth growing up.
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I... can’t even imagine how horrible that must have been.
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... It's true that I probably would've had a much happier life if I'd never known. But those were the cards I was dealt with, so...
[well.]
In the end, knowing—and having that time to prepare—saved my life. More importantly, it saved some of the people I cared about. I was supposed to die on my twelfth birthday. Instead, on that day, I escaped with some of my siblings. We actually managed to pull it off.
[...]
Which isn't to say things are easier now, or even necessarily better. We suffered losses to get this far. We're out in a world that humans were never meant to live in. We have to spend each day in fear. If we die now, it'll likely be a crueler death than what we would've had back at the orphanage.
But it's been worth it, to be free and able to call ourselves human beings—and not cattle children under the demons' control.
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[She listens carefully to everything he says, but:]
I get the point you’re trying to make, but it’s... different.
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... And besides, there's more than one reason a machine would be disposed of. Regardless of his emotional state, what do you think will happen to him once they design a "better" android model?
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That’s what he told me was going to happen to him, too. Maybe I could have helped him find a way around it if I wasn’t here.
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[a cheery way of putting it, but.]
And again, it goes back to what you value: a meaningless but ignorantly blissful life, or a difficult life but one where you had the capacity to decide things on your own terms.
I'm not Connor, so I won't decide for him which is better. But neither are you.
[...]
It's not all up to you. Don't get caught up in the trap of thinking it is, like the trap of wondering if you could've done more to save your brother. If Connor wants to find a solution, it's not like he's lacking in friends on the other side to consult with.
And in the end, there's still the matter of the wishes—what we came here for to begin with.
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[She opens her mouth to respond to that immediately, but she thinks better of whatever it was, taking a breath instead.]
...I don’t think either Justice or Love are going to win.
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I think they're all going to have a proper, final discussion tomorrow. I've asked Newt to see if he can get Patience to make the TV work one more time.
[a pause.]
Speaking of which—it's been confirmed. That rock makes you one of Patience's followers now. The living knows this too, which means that they officially have no choice but to coordinate, as they're all at risk of losing thanks to Patience's potential majority.
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Do you think it would count if I gave it back tomorrow? Sunday is defection day.
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... Julius might have your token, though.
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Wait, Julius? Why?
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[...]
I guess I can't really talk.
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